As of last Thursday, I officially turned nineteen. In honour of this, I’ve decided to share nineteen pieces of wisdom that I’ve learnt over the last several years of my life.
This blog, again, is going to be a bit of a list. I’ve been told that my blogs are getting a little repetitive, and I’m trying to spice them up a bit. However, this space is for me to express myself, and I think in a very repetitive way. Sorry, if it’s annoying some of you.
Lets move on to point one:
Not everyone is going to like you, and, similarly, I won’t like everyone I meet.
This is just a commonly known fact of life. You just can’t please everyone. Also, no matter how hard we try, we also won’t like everyone that crosses the path of our lives. We impact on the lives of everyone we meet, that’s what we’re told, however what we aren’t told is that sometimes we can negatively impact on someone’s’ life, or vice versa. Sometimes there are friends, sometimes there are people we dislike. Despite what we’re told, I think that it’s kind of out of our control.
This leads nicely onto point number two:
Your family and friends can save your life.
Yep. You read that right. Despite argument upon argument, sometimes your friends, or in my case mostly my family, really can save your life. Taking the time to trust the people around you, and to open up to the people you really can trust can feel like a weight lifted off your shoulders.
Although I fall out with my sister, and have disagreements with my parents, I would
probably be far more lost and lonely without them. Arguments and mistakes can make you a better person, and strengthen your relationships. Also, since finding C, and knowing I have someone I can rely on pretty much all the time, has really helped me sort out how much I stress, and he’s really helped me chill out.
On the note of family and friends, we move on to point three:
Pets can make the world a better place.
I know I don’t really talk about my two dogs on here very often. I’ve tried to write a blog on them before and it went terribly; since then, I haven’t tried again. However, I should give them some credit where it’s due. Despite the fact they would try to bite off the ankles of whoever is reading this, and despite the fact they hate socialising with other dogs and humans, my dogs are some of the kindest and sweetest animals in existence. They’ve helped me so much, especially Nora, and now that they’re in my life, I can happily say it’s so much better.
However, with a positive will probably always be a negative. Welcome to point four:
Weight is a media scam to get money.
Not many people know about the struggles of my family. I’ve only told the people I trust, and who I know I can talk to. You also might have found out from family members – in fact, you might even be one yourself – and for that, I suppose you know more about my family life than most.
I think that as a society our awareness of mental health is drastically improving, however the struggles with weight and calories is overlooked. It’s not just about fitting certain clothes, or losing weight. Sometimes it’s about putting weight on, and eating, and being healthy.
Being underweight is often so overlooked. I want to let you know that the mental health of those around you can drastically impact your own. I also want to let you know that there is never only one ‘victim’. It’s changed my life too.
Let’s move quickly onto point five:
My life isn’t worthless.
During a particularly awful part of my life, where I could trust very few people and couldn’t even write a diary entry without people reading it for entertainment with their friends, I used to think I’d be doomed to be a nobody forever. I was lost; I was scared, I didn’t know what was happening. I was young. However, now that I’m older, and I give less thought to what people think of me, I’ve realised that in the lives of the people who love me, and apricate me as me, I mean something. I can be who I want, and people can love me for it. My life isn’t worthless, it never has been.
A slightly unrelated point six:
Education is amazing, but education facilities have toxic atmospheres.
Yes, I like learning and I like trying. However, I hated school and college. One of the worst parts about school for me was the toxic and competitive atmosphere of ‘you’ve got to be cool. You’ve got to fit in. you’ve got to be the best.’. It’s disgusting. Why should it matter who you are? Or what you wear? Or how you choose to express yourself? Who cares if you wear glasses? Why is it all such a big deal? School should be about learning about the world, about different cultures and how to make the Earth we live on a better place. Why are teachers trying to teach about acceptance when they’re ignoring everyday bullying in their classes?
School sucks, but learning doesn’t.
Point seven:
Something is always changing.
Whether it be the weather, the political situation, whether we’re part of the EU, something is always changing. It always will change. Nothing ever stays the same. Styles change with generations, understandings change in different social groups and cultures. Language is changing. The world is changing. Everything is running out of control… But it would be boring if everything always stayed the same.
Number eight:
Hate will probably always exist.
It’s a fact of life and it’s not going to change any time soon. There will always be tensions between social groups, and it will usually be linked to people in different religions, or races. People with disabilities. There is a lot of hate surrounding different genders and sexualities. It’s not right, I wish there wasn’t, and we need to work harder – I think – to try and prevent social exclusion. Hate is most likely always going to exist. Whether it changes social groups, or causes wars. There is always going to be disagreements.
This leads nicely onto point number nine:
World peace will not be a possibility.
At least, I think this is the case for at least my lifetime. Despite the endless wars, and political tensions, we as a race haven’t learnt a thing from our ancestors. We overlook casualties, and innocent deaths. We overlook war. Just because it’s happening in another country, doesn’t mean it’s not our problem. There are still innocent people dying and, as a wise man once said: “Victory at the expense of the innocent is no victory at all”. (thank you, King T’Chaka, and just the MCU in general).
And now for point ten, which is completely unrelated:
Life won’t just be handed to you.
Life is tough, I think that’s just what it’s meant to be. I can’t just hope that my life is going to sort itself out, because it’s not. In honour of this, I recently made a to-do list of everything I’m planning to do as an author – which you can find in my latest blog, by clicking here.
Let me just flip my page for point eleven:
Books, unfortunately, only provide a temporary escape.
I think the reality of this fact has put me off reading a bit. Lately I’ve been struggling to finish books, perhaps because I know that they’re going to end and I probably won’t ever hear about the character’s lives again. I’ll never know if that couple are going to stay together, and I can never secure my OTP. Who am I going to ship once the book series ends? Is my life ever going to be complete if I don’t know what a certain character does for the rest of their lives? Either way, book nerd Emily is not happy. Sometimes she wants everything to last forever. Sometimes she forgets point seven. Everything is always changing.
And now we move onto more random points, such as point twelve:
You can never have too many plants.
Okay, before you start mum, or dad, or C, yes I know you think I have too many plants. However, I really don’t. I just don’t have enough room for them. For my fellow readers, I would like to make you aware of the fact that I have a total of four houseplants, three of which are succulents (one of whom is sadly, sadly, dying and I can’t seem to be able to help), and one of which is a cactus. They make me smile; I would love to have more. They also help clear the air in my room – which I share with two teenage girls. But, alas, my room is too small to have the amount of plants I would like, and my sisters won’t allow me to get some to sit on shelves, even though I’ll be the one looking after them. What a sad life I live.
Next, we lead onto two points that are somewhat more linked. Point thirteen, and point fourteen:
Cooking is fun.
I love cooking, especially my go-to meals for the family. (Haha, I sound like a food blogger). There’s something about providing for myself that makes me feel proud, and that I can adult, even if it take a while for me to cut up the vegetables. Despite the fact that I almost always burn something, I still surprise myself at how well I can cook, and how much it calms me down if I’m having a stressful day (or evening).
Baking is so very different from cooking.
Baking is like turning up in hell with cake ingredients. You’re constantly fighting with the scales which don’t want to measure out anything, let alone three-hundred grams of sugar. You’re trying to dig bicarb out of an overfilled cupboard, only to end up adding salt instead anyway by mistake. You’re constantly sweaty, can’t seem to form a not-sticky cookie mix, and breadcrumbs? How are you meant to make them with huge chunks of butter? You’ve got to get your hands in there. Baking is literally hell. Whoever thought making cakes at home was a good idea? They probably taste better from the local Baker’s anyway.
Hello point number fifteen:
Tattoos are difficult.
Yes, at some point, I want to get a tattoo. Yes, I know what of. No, I probably won’t tell you because I think tattoos are very personal. However, there are a couple problems with this whole tattoo thing. I’m finding it difficult to decide where to get one, I’m debating how much it will hurt. I’m struggling with deciding if the cost is worth it, even if it’s for the rest of my life. Also, getting it commissioned? Pft, that’s seems like a lot of hassle.
And with that we move onto an adult point for number sixteen:
The responsibility of being money wise sucks.
I stress about spending money. If it’s any sort of treat for myself, I panic. I feel as though I need reassurance to spend money on myself, even if it’s for something small such as a bar of chocolate, or a shirt that I like. I don’t know why, and I’m slowly accepting that I’m going to have to spend money on myself, especially if I want to buy a car and a house.
However, if I’m spending money on gifts, it’s a little different. I’m not sure why, I think it might be because I’m not spending it on myself but rather on making people happy. In reality, it’s probably no different, but it still feels different.
Point seventeen:
Being a vegetarian has its perks and struggles.
A plus side of being a vegetarian is that I can consciously say that I’ve never purposely eaten meat. I can also say that I’ve never worn leather shoes, or leather jackets. It’s always been faux leather and I’ve survived nineteen years doing this just fine. After all, what’s the point of killing animals if I don’t need to.
However, being a vegetarian also isn’t so great. I don’t mind the questions too much, but once I’m asked them all more than once, it starts to get frustrating. And then there are also the dares. “I dare you to eat a bit of this meat”. No. I won’t. If I did, I would most likely throw up, because my stomach isn’t used to digesting meat. Also, shoving it in my face is just disrespectful. It’s not funny, it’s disgusting. Please, if you’re determined to do that, just leave me alone. What’s the point? How does it benefit you?
Moving swiftly on, we arrive at point eighteen:
Self-doubt prevents us from following our dreams.
It’s a well know fact that as we grow older we tend to loose sight of what we want to do with our life. The ever-growing pressure of being money conscious pushes us into needing to find a job so that we can support ourselves and at some point move out of home. However, most of the time, we try to convince ourselves that our dream job isn’t want we will realistically ever do because the training is expensive and in the long run isn’t worth it, especially if we’re not too great at what we want to do. It’s all just self-doubt.
And finally, point number nineteen:
Being social really does make you feel better.
There’s not much I can say about this point, other than it’s completely true. I used to think it was a myth designed to try and push me from my comfort zone and out of the house, but it’s really not. When you’re with the right people, and you’re not feeling self-conscious or struggling to get your voice heard, everything is so much better. You don’t even have to go out (although going on walks does make me feel a whole lot better). You could invite people to your home and still feel just as great. Being social reminds us that we’re human.
That concludes the nineteen things I’ve learnt in my nineteen years of living. Apparently, I’ve written six pages, so I’ll maybe break this down into separate blog posts (surprise, I didn’t) so as not to overwhelm everyone. I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you have an awesome evening.
Once again, thank you for reading. You can find my social media links below, so be sure to give me a follow down there to keep up to date with my life.
Instagram: @emilybrownauthor
Facebook: @emilybrownauthor
You can find my previous blogs here: A Writer’s life
And I also have a Spotify playlist I listen to when writing my blogs, which you can find by clicking here.